Coz Of ...

I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep my expectations.

expectations humor

I'll be famous one day, but for now I'm stuck in middle school with a bunch of morons." - Greg Heffl

It's now very common to hear people say, 'I'm rather offended by that.' As if that gives them certai

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Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

Do you mean ter tell me," he growled at the Dursleys, "that this boy—this boy!—knows nothin' abou'—a

cluelessness humor ignorance math

Awww," Minho said. "That's almost as sweet as that time she slammed the end of a spear into your shu

It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and th

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I'm going to talk to her.""And how's that going to go? You're just going to walk up to her and say,

If you had a million years to do it in, you couldn't rub out even half the "Fuck you" signs in the w

fuck-you holden humor signs

You were wrong. She really is the new general in town."I smiled back, hoping he wasn't aware of my b

dimitri-belikov humor rose-hathaway

So I hear we get to go to town this weekend. Want to catch a movie or something?--ZP.S. That is, if

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You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were sw

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Crap, are you thinking what I'm thinking?""I'm thinking we have about fifteen vampires and no blood,

blood humor vampires

I wasn't fooled. He was avoiding looking at me. "There's nothing to talk about.""I knew you'd say th

dimitri-rose humor

Run first,' Shane said. 'Mourn later.'It was the perfect motto for Morganville.

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Is there any point asking what you're going to make me do on Sunday?''Not really.'Okay. 'Is there an

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What to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can't

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If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?

Sometimes, just saying that you hate something, and having someone agree with you, can make you feel

He f**ks even better than he looks”, I settled on saying. Several heads turned. I didn’t care; I was

bones cat humor sex

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